Misadventures in the Sink Trade [Scribblings from the Mitchy Side]

How to set fire to your kitchen

Part One of a very short series (I hope)

Step 1. Fail to tidy up kitchen before lunch, thus necessitating use of cooker top as counter

Step 2. Put plate with bread on right front ring of cooker

Step 3. Move pan of water from front left ring to back left ring to make room

Step 4. Get butter from fridge, take tub lid off, place it on front left ring. Put tub of butter on top.

Step 5. Butter bread, while keeping an eye on burger that is being grilled.

Step 6. Absently turn on ring to heat water in pan.

Step 7. Sniff. Wonder what that sudden smell of burning plastic is.

Step 8. Realise you have set fire to butter tub....

I am happy to report the only casualty was the tub lid which melted beautifully. As a bonus, I have now discovered that melted plastic hardens quickly and can be easily scraped off your cooker rings :P

If anyone wants me, I'll be sobbing quietly into my cup of tea and making peace with Senility.

PS: England 4: Northern Ireland 0. Yay!!

PPS: New Dr Who episode tonight! Squee!

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Thanks for the instructions -- I don'want implement them,lol

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Ah, where's your sense of adventure!? :)

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You are a genius.

*bows* Thank you :)

I know this because I, too, have attempted something similar. Of course, I just put a plastic tub of butter on my heated burner. :)

Heh, alternative directions (requires teamwork):

1. Fry an egg for breakfast.

2. Forget to turn the hob off.

Now here's where you'll need a partner -- these instructions are for them:

3. Place pile of bags of gardening seeds on hob, without realising that hob is on.

4. Scream madly.

Absolutely not speaking from experience, here ... O:)

Absolutely not speaking from experience, here

No, no, of course not :)

I have another variation on the theme:

1) turn on grill

2) place sausages under grill

3) start preparing the rest of breakfast, open tin of beans, chop mushrooms, etc

4) forget sausages

5) wonder what funny burning smell is

6) whip grill pan out from under grill just before it bursts into flame

7) watch helplessly as grill pan handle melts through and burning sausages plus grill pan fall to floor

8) pray rush matting doesn't catch fire

*winces* OK, your's is worse than mine. No food gave up its life during my attempt *mourns the sausages*

An amusing variation is to leave a couple of mugs on one ring, and turn that ring on, instead of the one with the pan of soup on it.

A few minutes later, become intrigued by the way the lower reaches of the mugs are turning brown and their glaze is crazing over, while the soup is resolutely cold.

Pick up a mug to investigate.

Run fingers under cold water tap.

Clear bits of mug off floor.

Have cheese sandwich instead of soup.

Personally, I blame whoever invented smooth ceramic hobs that just beg to be used as shelving.

Rik

I shouldn't have sniggered, I really shouldn't. It's just that the way you described it making it totally unecessary to fill in the sequence of events from picking up the mug to running your fingers under the cold tap :D

Soup's good....;)

Scribblings from the Mitchy Side

Misadventures in the Sink Trade

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January